The hill looked intimidating. I avoided looking at where it crests over which was way beyond my plan. All I wanted was to give the hill a try. It had been so long since I ran a hill workout, I couldn’t remember when.
Staring at this hill, I wondered if I‘m still fit enough to run it. Psychologically, I could not let the hill defeat me. Must give it a try even if only once, I said to myself. The mental dialogs illustrate the extent of engagement I contemplated about doing a hill run. Similar episodes repeat in other domains. Do I or don‘t I?
Covid-19 notwithstanding, it is up to me to decide how much I want to engage. Full engagement (100%) would be ideal. In reality, lots of excuses get in the way: weather is too hot, hill too steep, body too tired, etc.
Funny part is that it wasn‘t as tedious before. Full engagement was my standard operating procedure or expectation. Go all in, and nothing less. Now, that full engagement seems more like a goal?
What changed? The most obvious reason is I am getting older, body softer, and less flexible. Can’t explode out of the block anymore (wthout hurting myself). What 100% now maybe only 80% or less of before.
But nevertheless mentally I like to think I am fully engaged. Only age appropriate now. And, by the way, as for the hill, yes I did run it, six times (6X).
Do you feel any gaps in your mind-body connection?
Running with Buddha 